blogging.
most people need to know that as we get older, year after year, our social groups
lessen because every year you drift apart from certain people to maintain the right
friends that you only need. sure it will feel like you have no friends, but no dont think
of it that way. you will have the truest friends that will stay close with you through the
years on. the other people you “hang” out with other people, they will most likely
not be your friend in highschool. you dont need them though! your groups will get
smaller and smaller and by college you find new friends, but when you come home to
visit your old true friends that you have kept close to your heart, those are the people
you will be visiting and partying and who knows what else. i just thought i’d share
that so people will realize that having the most friends and trying to keeep all those
people who you dont need by your side is not a bad thing, but its okay to drift
apart from those people. no one said you have no friends. but no one said you had
true friends either..yet.
god you know when you cant explain what you are feeling? its so annoying. like you’re a little discouraged and you wanna let it go and just leave it alone. and then you feel like you really dont care about whats going on around you and you just want to move away, grow older, have your own appartment, and just live freely? or when you know you have to do something.. but you just dont want to do it because theres other tasks you need to complete first.. so basically you are just stuck at that moment? i HATE this.
i dont know what im going through. this sucks major bawls. i love my friends.. but truly there are a few that are completely honest with me, and actually stay there when i need them. they dont move on to “bigger” and “better” things. they just chill and let it all fall into place :) without caring about hmm.. what people will think of them/what will happen/when they will loose their “popularity” and shit. dude i dont even know why theres such thing as popularity! no one cares! we are all just people going to this everyday activity called school. somehow between those events it matters who you are going out with.. what clothes you have.. or what you look like. how greasy your hair is.. how fake your uggs are.. or how fat you look. i really do not get why this is all such a sucker. i love people who are nice to me and dont ignore whatever i say. what really pisses me off is when ill be talking to my guy friends and some other chick that is my “best friend” comes over and starts like-you know. its so nubbish.. real pals just dig it :D i love you guys. even though it doesnt seem like it because i barley talk to you in the hallways sometimes. yeah im just blabbing on because what the fuck its a blog entry.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. i need to explore the whole world. thats my goal in life. no thats a lie. my goal is to “get my name out there” and i want it badly. but… who doesnt. music is mah boyfriend! okay so ive listened to hero/heroine on my itunes library exactly 1,545 times. yes! that is one thousand-five hundred-forty-five times. i swear. its my favorite song ever. i cant get over it!
oh man. right now im like feeling stupid. i dont know what to say when its the time to say it. and whatever is true, like no kidding like legit, i studder so much. its so annoying. cause then people think im fucking lieing and im retarted or something. i just feel in need to shoot someone in the pinky toe! ahhh i need/want a boyfriend :(
everything that comes out of my mouth is spoken wrong
-shanayss
